Before The Big Binge On Friday Let’s Recap Season 3 (OITNB)
In what feels to have been the longest year in waiting-for-a-series history, we are now officially counting down the hours until Orange Is The New Black is returned to our screens. Season 4 is upon
In what feels to have been the longest year in waiting-for-a-series history, we are now officially counting down the hours until Orange Is The New Black is returned to our screens. Season 4 is upon us and I think I can speak on behalf of all fans (everyone) that it’s super super exciting, I mean, shit is gunna hit the fan. While we patiently wait in anticipation of the new season I thought a little recap of season 3 would be a good idea to refresh our memories and recap on the pivotal events that took place in Litchfield 2k15.
- Alex was back in the building. Miss Vause found herself back at Litchfield after Piper snitched on her in season 2 of her plans to leave town even though that violated her probation. Alex is super pissed off with Piper but still manage to squeeze in a little ‘hate-sex’, they make-up, they fight, and make-up, same old same old. However, Alex becomes totally mentally unstable and believes her ex-boss has sent someone in to kill her, her paranoia annoys Piper and she soon becomes bored and takes a liking to one of the new inmates.
QUEUE RUBY ROSE.
- Ruby Rose AKA Stella Carlin is one of the new inmates at Litchfield who Piper all of a sudden takes a fancy to, I mean who hasn’t took a fancy to her!?
- Crazy eyes becomes the new E.L. James and writes her own 50 shades of orange except it’s called The Timehump Chronicles. The inmates can’t get enough and want more of the pornographic, alien loving novel. Suzanne wants to reenact some of the pages from her novel and makes very close friends with Maureen. Cute.
- The girls seem to think that Norma has healing powers and can calm their mind and soul, they plan to start their own religion until they find Norma is a big, fat, fake and want nothing more to do with it.
- After the NCC take over Litchfield, old correctional officers are not happy with the way things are being ran, the new correctional officers are ex-donut-shop workers and the food has became really shitty. Red is back in the kitchen and will have nothing to do with the new pre-prepared food, while some of the inmates try to convert to Judaism to get a better meal.
- There’s a new job sewing panties for a bigger wage and everyone is super excited that is when Piper comes up with a plan to use the extra material to make more pants to sell to creepy, weirdo, ‘panty sniffers’, to make some extra dollar for when she leaves Litchfield. However, Stella whom Piper has been snogging behind Alex’s back has stole her money for when she is released in a day. Piper takes revenge and issues it a warning to the inmates to not fuck with her. Stella did kind of warn her though, you know, with that white tattoo that said ‘Trust No Bitch’, remember?
- Nicky relapsed and after having started to sell herion with one of the officers, Luschek, the dirty dog, she inevitably got caught as a spare baggy was lurking around Luschek’s office, she then got sent to max security and she hasn’t been seen since. Poor Nicky. Miss you.
- Daya had her baby, woohoo, congrats hun, but Bennet is nowhere to be seen! You bastard. Luckily though, she didn’t sell it to Pornstache’s mother, (yes, Pornstache made an appearance and without the tache!! Still going to call him Pornstache though) but the truth has came out about it not being his baby. Holy mother of God.
Pennsatucky finds herself in an awful situation with one of the new wardens in which he rapes her and makes her do weird things like crawl around in the mud and bark and quack. My heart goes out to her. Herself and Big Boo manage to take revenge but I feel more is definitely to come in season 4 with this story line.
I think the only way we can now hype ourselves even more is to watch the full trailer for season 4.